Right now, it’s the middle of summer and it’s humid. This is incredibly unusual for where I live which is normally on the cool side of things. Humidity barely comes into it. So when I’m struggling to sleep in 25 degree humid temperatures at night, my heart goes out to those women who suffer from night sweats as they transition through peri-menopause.

Not everyone suffers from these, and I’m one of the lucky few who doesn’t, but it’s common knowledge that these are part of the transition into our Second Spring and our wisdom years.

The other symptoms

But what about all those other symptoms? Some of us are experiencing things we didn’t even know were part of this process because NOBODY TALKS ABOUT IT!

And what’s worse is that, even though half the population will experience this transition, I recently heard that during medical school only 3 hours is devoted to menopause. Now, this could be completely wrong and I have not yet been able to verify this (am working on that as I write this) but if that’s true, is it any wonder that our Doctors aren’t particularly helpful or informed when it comes to seeking help. In fact the first port of call for a lot of them is to prescribe anti-depressants.

So, I thought I would highlight some of the lesser known symptoms of peri-menopause, plus those that we all know about, just so that if you ARE experiencing a combination of these, you are aware of what might be causing them.

Also, did you know that 25% of women have hardly any symptoms, 50% get a moderate amount, and 25% of women suffer terribly.

So, here’s my list in no particular order (disclaimer - I am not a doctor or anything to do with the medical profession so this is a layman’s list but I have based this list on what I have read, seen, heard and experienced).

Mental and emotional symptoms

1. Anxiety - things that never caused a problem before suddenly make you feel anxious e.g. driving

2. Panic attacks - even if this is not something you’ve encountered before, suddenly they can become a thing.

3. Loss of confidence - this can be particularly distressing for women in high powered jobs where confidence is everything.

4. Brain fog - can’t think clearly or find solutions to problems

5. Unable to find words - the right words just seem to evade you and the lift becomes “that thing that goes up and down between the floors” because the word ‘lift’ just won’t come into your mind

6. Tears everywhere - emotions are all over the place

7. Anger and frustration - it’s not uncommon to be really angry at everyone and everything. Things that never used to bother you suddenly become unbearable

8. Depression - need I say more?

9. Mood swings and irritability - totally unpredictable and not related to life events

10. Inability to concentrate - watching a movie or completing that spreadsheet suddenly becomes too hard

11. Memory issues - can’t remember anything!

Physical symptoms

1. Insomnia - wide awake at 3.00 am? Peri-menopause could have something to do with this.

2. Hot flashes - come on swift and strong at any time of the day or night and feel like you are about to internally combust.

3. Night sweats - often involving having to get up and take a cool shower as well as change the bed because the sheets are soaked.

4. Irregular periods - it turns up, disappears for a couple of months, turns up again after two weeks, disappears, turns up regularly for a couple of months and generally just keeps you guessing as to whether it’s going to turn up early, on time or not at all.

5. Very heavy or very light periods - some women experience flooding, going through a super size tampon every two hours. Others experience lighter periods than they are used to.

6. Dryness - particularly vaginal dryness making any intimacy painful and unpleasant. For others, like me, it’s my eyes being super dry, needing special care and eye drops every day.

7. Breast soreness - called mastalgia, hormone changes cause fluid to build up in breasts causing soreness or tenderness.

8. Breast changes - breasts can either grow bigger, get smaller or change shape during peri-menopause.

9. Loss of libido - if your sex drive has gone out the window, peri-menopause could be the culprit.

10. Weight gain - often unexpected and out of nowhere, weight starts piling on even though you haven’t changed your diet and are getting lots of exercise.

11. Headaches - often more frequent and migraine like but without the aura (i.e. the symptoms such as flashing lights that come before a migraine strikes).

12. Fatigue - no energy to do anything. This could be due to lack of sleep or just a general tiredness and lack of energy.

13. Tingling in hands, feet, arms and legs - usually only lasting for a few minutes at a time.

14. Joint pain - like arthritis

15. Electric shock type sensations - this can feel like a rubber band snapping in the layer of tissue between the skin and muscle

16. Itchiness and dry skin - across the body, face and genitals

17. Thinning hair - my hair fell out so much I thought I was going to end up bald

18. Dizzy spells - caused by fluctuating oestrogen levels which means blood sugar levels rise and fall, leading to dizziness

19. Body odour - stronger body odour and increased sweating

20. Osteoporosis - a lack of bone density caused by a reduction in oestrogen

21. Burning mouth - can also be tingly, numb or tender in and around the mouth

22. Change in taste - sometimes experienced as a metallic or bitter taste

23. Bloating - caused by water retention or gassiness

24. Brittle nails - usually caused by a lack of water in the body

Some say there are roughly 34 symptoms of peri-menopause, others say many more. The problem is that we all have different experiences so what may be a symptom for one may not affect another.

The good news

This is just a phase - it, too, shall pass!

Well, most of it anyway. Some women have ongoing symptoms after menopause but given that we generally have a new and stronger sense of self after menopause it’s more likely that we will demand to get the support we need.

The other good news is that there are things you can do to support you through this phase. Hormone Replacement Therapy (now called Menopausal Hormone Therapy) has been helping thousands of women. The cancer scare issue of previous years that put everyone off HRT has now been debunked, and new methods and doses of HRT have been developed. This has been a life saver for many, many women - me included.

Diet and exercise

Diet and exercise obviously play their part. As noted in Nicky Pellegrino’s book “Don’t Sweat It” the Mediterranean diet still seems to be the most highly recommended but she also notes that a diet which is low in processed foods and high in colourful fruits and vegetables, fibre, lean protein and good fats will support you through peri-menopause/menopause.

Eating three hours before going to bed, reducing spicy foods (that can encourage night sweats in some), and reducing caffeine and alcohol intake have all been suggested as ways to manage the symptoms of peri-menopause. Most dieticians or nutritionists generally seem to recommend all that anyway, whether you are peri-menopausal or not.

What I’m really trying to say

What I’m really trying to say here is that you don’t need to go through this on your own. We are starting to live in a more enlightened age where there are solutions to the symptoms of peri-menopause (thank goodness - and it’s about time!).

If your doctor heads straight for the anti-depressants, and that doesn’t feel right to you, ask for something different. Don’t be afraid to go to different doctors until you find one who will really listen to you and prescribe something that is helpful.

I went to an integrated doctor who had more of a holistic approach and told me that the ‘norm’ criteria on blood tests may not necessarily reflect MY norm, and that we needed to find what was right for me. And when we did finally get the combination right, it was so good. Life became easier, my moods were more stable, my weight gain stopped and my hair began to grow back.

But it took some time, and it took some tweaking before we found the right combination that worked for me and my body. And it hasn’t fixed everything, because my body continues to change, so the journey continues.

It’s not early onset dementia

I just wanted to let you know that although you maybe can’t find your words, your memory seems to be failing you, your moods are all over the place and your body seems to have a mind of its own, you don’t have early onset dementia. It’s simply the massive transition we are making into our Second Spring, and this too shall pass.

Karen