Do you realise you might be spending the next 30, 40, or maybe even (if you are really lucky) 50 years of your life in post menopause? That’s a long time. On average women spend 35% of their live in this phase. But that also gives us the time to really settle into our new role of Wise Woman.

For each stage in a woman’s life there is some sort of change or rite of passage. When a girl becomes a woman, she gets her first period (menarche). At this she moves into the Maid archetype.

When a woman has a baby she becomes a mother and moves into the Mother archetype. For those women that haven’t had babies it may be that they birth a business, or their career, or perhaps become a stepmother.

And it’s menopause that marks our move into our Wise Woman years. This means we’ve progressed into our Maga years, the Autumn life season, before we reach the Crone archetype, the winter life season.

The Maga phase has been introduced to the Maid/Mother/Crone archetypes because it’s now recognised that we live so much longer and we have an extended phase between Mother and Crone. In Jane Hardwick Collins “Introduction to Maga” she indicates that:

“In “The Women’s Wheel of Life” Elizabeth Davis and Carol Leonard describe this season of a woman’s life with the archetypes of the Amazon, the Matriarch and the Priestess. Keywords and phrases for the Maga are: harvesting one’s life skills and talents, confidence, competence, assimilation, integration, power, giving back, contributing, community-mindedness, maturity, presence, security, abundance, sharing, storing for the future, queen and magician, knowing self.”

The Crone is one who sees clearly and with insight, and who has lived through love, sorrow, hope and fear, coming through it all with experience and wisdom.

Unfortunately we’ve come to dread the idea of menopause and post menopause because in the society in which we’ve been brought up, it’s the young, fertile woman that has been worshipped. The elder woman or Wise Woman has not been recognised or valued. In fact, she’s usually overlooked.

For some women this is a blessing. Not being the subject of the male gaze can be quite liberating and freeing. For other women they feel they disappear into anonymity - unseen, unheard and unvalued. This can be quite the blow to ones self confidence, purpose and sense of direction.

Wise Women are respected for their knowledge and wisdom, for their life experience, and their ability to provide sound guidance. In some cultures, it is the elders who are called upon to perform certain rites or ceremonies. The elders/Wise Women often hold the knowledge of the family or tribal history, traditions and practices. They hold the balance in their hands.

We also see this in the animal kingdom, where the matriarchs of the elephant and orca families are the ones who lead the herd or pod to the feeding grounds unknown by other members of the family. They have a deep inner knowledge and knowing that they can call upon.

But we are not in a matriarchal society. Unfortunately for those of us living in a Westernised society, this means we don’t have role models of Wise Women.

For me the question running around in my head is “how do we become a Wise Woman?” Is it simply that we hit post menopause and we are suddenly there? Or is there something else that defines a Wise Woman, and if so, what is that?

My reflections on this indicate to me that it’s an inner power, a stepping into who you truly are - your fully authentic self. Not all women achieve this. We have, after all, been stripped of our power for thousands of years. I know many women in their senior years, and there are very few who stand out as being truly Wise Women, who hold that mantle of wisdom, dignity, knowledge, experience and grace.

Menopause is the marker that takes us from being mother to maga (in the maiden/mother/maga/crone concept). It’s not an easy transition for a lot of women. It seems to be that the way we have managed to gain our freedom in society is to act as much like a man as we can.

We’ve had to let go of our cyclical nature and the ebbs and flows that brings in order to turn up, particularly at work, in a consistent, unchanging, productive manner. We’ve had to hide the very things that make us a woman - our menstrual cycle and menopause. We’ve lost touch with our bodies and what they are telling us and, according to the studies I’ve read, this is causing us a problem with our menstrual and menopause symptoms.

The women who are the most ‘successful’ in this world are those who can sit easily in their masculine energy - that of being outspoken, dominant, strong, fierce and competitive. They are female warriors in a male dominated world.

Right now I can’t think of any really successful women who are sitting in their feminine energy - that of community, compassion, creativity, sharing and supporting. They will be out there, but they may well be the unsung hero’s in the community.

But things are changing. Society is changing. The world is changing. There is a new consciousness that perhaps there is a better way. Perhaps the aggressive, competitive, power hungry approach isn’t really working any more and we need something new, something different to take it’s place.

Perhaps now is the time for the rise of the Wise Woman in Western society. Those of us going through the peri/menopause journey right now have an opportunity to create the life we want moving forward, to step into our Second Spring with purpose and direction and to live that life to the fullest. And also to be the Wise Woman role models for our daughters and granddaughters.

But we cannot get there without putting in the work, healing the wounds that come up again during our menopause transition, reflecting on our life, learning the lessons that need to be learnt, taking the gems that present themselves, and turning the difficulties into rare treasures with silver linings we couldn’t see when we were in the thick of it all.

These are the things that make a Wise Woman.

Living a life, but not learning the lessons or healing the wounds, just makes an old woman. It’s the learning, the healing, the experiencing and the growing that creates a Wise Woman - someone to be revered and sought after.

There is a new beginning here for us all. Every single one of us has something to offer. I’m about to begin exploring the role of the Wise Woman in our modern society and to help women to step into that role.

Will you join me on your search for your inner Wise Woman?

Kàren